How to Become the Wisest Person You Know

Follow these simple steps to become the wisest person you know. Dazzle your friends with your logical arguments. And most importantly, learn to make good decisions and discern good from bad sources of wisdom. Being wise doesn't have to take years. Learn to be wise immediately with hardly any effort. If that seems too good to be true, you have a lot to learn.

In order to become the wisest person in the world, first of all you need to believe everything in the media. Especially this article on hubpages, because we all know if it's on the internet, it must be factual, important, and useful.

Remember to never trust books, or old people. Especially old dead people. If Ben Franklin, Gandhi, and King Solomon were so smart then why are they dead? And by the way, don't let others convince you into believing that you will actually die someday yourself. This is just something people say to keep your perspective small. Keep your mind open. REALLY OPEN. Don't believe anything unless you actually see it yourself. That pretty much eliminates having to study history or religion. Now you are on your way!

Stop listening and start talking. Only the wisest people know the secret that smart people talk a lot more than dumb people. Even if you are a total fool, you will appear wise if you talk more. Don't wait for people to ask your opinion. Open your mouth at every possible opportunity. Use as many words as possible. Don't get caught up in details like the convect of the situational circumcisions, not knowing the definitive of the word, or using proper verbage. "Uh" and "Like" are great filler words to increase your word count. Which brings me to my second point.

Learn to effectively use the word "Whatever." This is the wisest of all sayings which will allow you the upper hand in any logical argument when you need to show ignorant people how stupid they are. For example, if a stupid ignoramus tries to convince you that it's not a good idea to buy things without the money to pay for them, just say "Whatever!" The louder the better.

Once you have stunned the ignoramus with the magic word, act quickly. Don't take time to think. The wise saying goes, "Don't let the sun go down on your decision." So make all your important decisions before you go to bed.

When bad things happen, which even happen to wise people like you, you have two options. First is to ignore the issue, and go on like it never happened. Whatever it is, the longer you wait, the easier it is to deal with. Especially things such as debt or pregnancy. Sometimes people try to drag you down and force you to deal with problems right away. These so called "real friends" don't have your best intentions in mind. Friends are supposed to be fun, right? In fact if you think about it they are probably the ones who created the problem. Tell them how they are responsible for the problem. If they still want to talk, then they must really hate you. Get away from them!

Never change. Keep it real, and don't let anyone try to change your mind. Ever!

For extra credit watch more television. 2.5 hours a day is average, so make sure you're far above average. Keep it off of TLC, Discovery, or PBS. These channels rot your brain very quickly.