Funny 911 Emergency Calls: Don't Call 911 For These Stupid Dumb Reasons

Would you call 911 if someone messed up your cheeseburger order? Would you call 911 to get a date with a cop? Would you call 911 if you were locked inside your own car? The videos on this hub prove that some people believed these were good reasons to call 911.

It's amazing that some of the people who call 911 even know what the number for 911 is. Unfortunately people misuse and abuse the 911 emergency call center, putting others in danger by tying up the 911 dispatch phone lines with unimportant calls that sound more like pranks or "Saturday Night Live" sketches. Enjoy these 10 dumb reasons to call 911.

"You're supposed to be here to protect me."

What kind of world are we living in that you can't call 911 to see to it that justice is served with a side of fries? Maybe there should be a Burger Land with an actual "Burger King." Then the Burger Knights could come and joust the servers for tyranny. The dispatcher's line is priceless, "We're not going to go down there and enforce your Western Bacon Cheeseburger."  What is the Burger King motto?  "Have it your way?"

"I took um two um Viagra uh pills um, and my erection has been up for like four days."

Viagra uh is um dangerous um, but I feel sorry for the guy um who had to call um 911 about this. If you think a little further about this one, you realize this guy probably had to miss work for the same reason. So many jokes for this one, but they are all innapropriate. Lesson learned, don't take Viagra without a prescription. And if you find yourself in this situation, take yourself to the hospital earlier than four days.

"I just thought he was cute. I'm 45 years old, and I'd like to meet him again. But I don't know how to go about doing that."

Don't call 911 for this reason unless your fantasy is to actually be arrested by the cop you hink is cute. There are other numbers for this sort of thing. This makes almost as much sense as robbing a bank to get a date with a cop. This is sad, and speaks for humanity's need for connection. The need can become so strong it becomes an emergency. This proves that humans need connection in order to survive.

"I can't find the movie theater and the movie starts in 5 minutes... I know, I'll call 911. It's an emergency."

No, it's not an emergency. You may be late, but you missing a movie isn't worth someone else missing a limb because the 911 emergency response wasn't fast enough.  Don't tie up the phone line with this nonsense while someone else is tying off their tourniquet. 

"I am going to be late for the movies. I can't believe how long this is taking. I better call 911 to report the situation."

Can you see a visual of an emergency? Do you see red and blue lights already? Do you hear sirens? Only call if you are pretty sure someone needs some help. Don't be so selfish as to call 911 to find out what happened because youare curious or want to know how long you will have to wait. Of course, if your wife is having a baby in the back seat, you might want to go ahead an make that call.

"What in the world? It's been 3 O'clock for two hours... Time must have stopped. I better call 911."

No. You're watch battery just died. Look at your cell phone for the time, it's probably more accurate anyway. Don't call 911, call a friend who lives in the same time zone. Call 911 only after checking at least 100 clocks that have all stopped at the same time and someone's life is in danger. But if you are a police officer who is high on marijuana brownies, I guess you should call 911.

"Oh man, it looks like there's a big storm coming. I better call 911 to see what's going on."

Your storm is not an emergency until it's threatening someone's life. So if a tornado levels your house and your head is bleeding, then you should call. If your dog is barking like crazy, put him outside. It's not an emergency just yet. 911 emergency response is not a substitute for looking up the weather phone number, even if the power is out. Call information, then call the weather number and the power company.

"Oh hey, I was just testing to see if my cell phone was working. Thanks."

Don't be the guy who abuses 911 because you aren't creative enough to think of calling someone else. That goes for you guys who want to teach your kids about 911. Don't call just to show your kids that the police WILL show up even if you just dial 911 and hang up.

"Ga Ga Goo... Hello? Oh sorry my baby had my cell phone and must have called 911."

Stuff like this happens to the best of us, but you don't want your baby or you to be responsible for preventing someone else's baby from getting help while choking on a hot dog. Buy a fake phone and give it to the baby, or give the kid your keys. The kid won't know the difference of the toy phone, and babies can't drive.

"I'm locked inside my car... It's getting hot in here, and I'm not feeling well."

This one would become an emergency as the heat eventually would make the woman sick to the point of passing out, so this could be pretty serious.  Maybe it's a good idea to check the owner's manual in the glove box first.  Of course, a friend might be able to help you think of this too.

As technology progresses, there are always those who are unable to deal with the problems that arise. Here are some examples of a man calling 911 because his iPhone was not working. The audio clips show the man is definitely wasting the emergency dispatcher's time. He even says, “Why can’t you direct me to the AT&T people?” in one of his multiple calls. I think this guy could be a spokesperson on an Apple commercial. And he could say, "There's an app for that."

The purpose of this hub is for a laugh and to educate those who may not know some of the poor reasons for calling 911. This hub could save a life by keeping the phone lines at 911 emergency call centers from being tied up with shenanigans. Of couse, call 911 for all your appropriate emergency needs possibly including being trapped in your car or a four day erection, depending on the circumstances. Some reasons, however, are not good excuses to call 911. See the following sources to know when to call 911.